Impulse

Two young men and a donkey are on a stake out waiting for a suspected killer to return.

Jim:  How long do you think this will be?

Jeff: How ever long it takes for some one to kill a person hide their body and get back.

Jim: So how long is that?

Jeff: I don't know, now shut up!

Jim: Dang

Jeff: Shh, here he comes.

Jim: Huh?

Jeff: What?

Jim: What?

Jeff: Huh?

Jim: What?

Jeff: Shh!

Jim: What?

Jeff: Huh?

Jim: Huh?

Donkey: What?

Jim: Huh?

Jeff: Shh!

Donkey: What?

Jim: What?

Jeff: Quite!!!!!

Jim: Wow Jeff way to give away our position.

Bad Poetry

I made a person cry.
I am not sure why.
Maybe i will fry.... in hell.
Or I could f go to this person and say that they are a coward for crying.
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm
No, na, nope I ain't gonna do dat.
You and I will fly and cry and maybe laters we can pry a door open, a door into a new sparking relationship.
I will ask, I-I w-will a-ask is the question
W-we will see

Direct Orders SON!!

You have been given Direct Orders to Rock Out! Rock out like you had a mile long fruit roll up.  Rock out like you just got a new car and it comes with Hayden Panettiere.  Rock out like your favorite band came on and it was the last song you were ever gonna here.  Rock out like....... like your foot just came free after being stuck for 4,000,000 years.  Rock out like you just won a life time shopping card to Walmart.  Rock out like you just discovered a new element.  Rock out like you were it second grade again and you didn't give a crap what other people thought about you. Rock out like you figured out that Abraham Lincoln just came alive from the dead just to talk to you.  Rock out like if you did than you would get a free game of bowling at Jack and Jills.  Like if you died but wait hold up no you didn't.  Rock out like you threw a cup cake at a kid.  Rock out like what ever you did you people would be like yeeeeaaaaahhh man thats tight.  Like you just found the last fruit snack or the last can of peaches.  Rock out like well yeah like you were almost killed by a pack of Flamingos but you dodged them.  Like you just got a free pizza.  Like you just found out Pokemon were real.  Rock out like you just met a beautiful woman.  Rock out like tomorrow was the second coming and you had a free past straight to the Celestial Kingdom.  Rock out like....... just rock out!

Shake the Dust

This is for the old man alone on the front porch. This is for the kid that no matter how much he tries, no mater how much he speaks out is never heard. For the Dad with no family...... alone in the world.  Shake the Dust.  This is for the suicidal, that some day they must see that life is not fair that what ever happens dying will come in its own due time.  For the pubescent teenagers. For the mid aged single men and woman looking and hoping for love. For the lonely.  Shake the Dust.  Get up when life takes some part of you, take it back shake the dust off yourself and fight back keep moving forward.  This is for all the girls that will cry themselves to sleep tonight.  This is for the ones with closed eyes trying to stay free of the world trying to block out every thing they've known,  that some day the may have the courage to open their eyes and accept the world around them.  For the many wanderers wondering what to wonder.  Shake the Dust.  This is for the kid that eats alone.  For the man working as hard as he can but knowing that it will never be enough.  This is for the mothers with a wayward son.  For the haters.  For the people enclosed by themselves but no matter how hard they try they can not break free. Shake the Dust.  When you feel your world broken down, like it has turned around.  Grab your world by its shoulders turn it around, look it in the eyes and shake the damn dust off it.  Give 'er a little twirl, let spin, and shine like a pearl.  Then when its spun around and around spin her again and finally you will have shaken the dust off your world and now you can break free from the dust holding you back and move forward.